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I am tired of London and of ze English ladies’ manners. Police to ze Baron von Blitzenberg! Ve shall go to St Egbert’s, Bonker!” The Baron and Mr Bunker walked arm-in-arm along the esplanade at St Egbert’s-on-Sea. “Aha!” said the Baron, “zis is more fresh zan London!”
The Baron Rudolph von Blitzenberg, as I have said, had a warm heart. He was, besides, alone in one hundred and twenty square miles of strangers and foreigners when he had happened upon this congenial spirit. He began in a tone of the most ingenuous friendliness— “I haf no friends here. My introdogtions zey are gone. Bot I haf moch money, and I vish a, vat you say?—showman, ha, ha, ha!
I take you to be the type of the conventional aristocrat. Why, a fellow who's been travelling in Germany said to me lately, when I asked about you 'Von Blitzenberg, said he, 'he's used as a simile for traditional dignity. His very dogs have to sit up on their hind-legs when he inspects the kennels!" The Baron with a solemn face gulped down his whisky-and-soda.
“Whoever is that tall fair man in front?” Dr Escott asked his partner as they crossed the hall. “Oh, that’s the Baron von Blitzenberg: such an amusing man! We are all in love with him already.” All through dinner the spurious Baron saw that Dr Escott’s eyes turned continually and curiously on him; yet never for an instant did his spirits droop or his conversation flag.
"Who can despair of human nature while the Baron von Blitzenberg adorns the earth?" he reflected. "The discovery of champagne and the invention of summer holidays were minor events compared with his descent from Olympus!" He bought a button-hole at the street corner and cocked his hat, more airily than ever.
To me, Baron von Blitzenberg! Teufel!’ I replied.” “And that was all, Baron?” asked Mr Bunker, in what seemed rather like a tone of relief. “No; suddenly he did turn back and said, ‘By ze vay, who vas zat viz you last night?’ To vich I replied, ‘If you address me again, my man, I vill call ze police. Go avay!’ ” “Bravo, Baron! Ha, ha, ha! Excellent!” laughed Mr Bunker.
“Let us call it so,” he replied, looking pensively out to sea. It seemed wiser to Lady Alicia to change the subject. “Who is the friend you are staying with?” she asked, suddenly. “My old friend the Baron Rudolph von Blitzenberg, and your own most recent admirer,” he replied. “I am at present living with, in fact I may say upon, him.” “Does he know?”
"Let me introduce my nephew, Lord Tulliwuddle the Baroness von Blitzenberg," said she; and having innocently hurled this bomb, retired from further participation in the drama. With young and diffident men Alicia had a pleasant instinct for conducting herself as smilingly as though they were the greatest wits about the town.
Now indeed she saw there was no cause to mourn, for any one at all resembling the Baron von Blitzenberg as he appeared at that moment she had certainly never met before.
In fact, since you demand to know the truth, I may inform you that the Prince added that leave of absence was readily given, since the Baron's diplomatic duties are merely nominal. To quote his own words, 'Von Blitzenberg is a nice fellow, and it pleases the English ladies to play with him."
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