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"'Come back, you thafe of the worruld! says I. "'Silence, you old hag! says he. "Actilly he called me an old hag! I wanted to go after him, but there was two hoodlums hangin' round, and I knew they'd carry off some of my apples, when, just as I was at my wits' end, Dodger came round the corner. "'Dodger, I screamed, 'go after that man! He's taken one of my apples, widout lave or license!
Whin I first read the paper that speaks of it, it seemed the simplest thing in the worruld to come here and put me fut on it; but now that Oi'm here, and have seen the place, by me sowl I can't see or understand how Oi'm to go about it. And no more can anny of the rest of us. So the long and the short of it is, misther, that you'll have to find the place for us."
"Begorrah, it's a cabbage, all the worruld over!" exclaimed the first mate, who had accompanied Mr Meldrum in his quest. "Sure you'd hardly know the hid ov the baste, if it was cut off, from one grown in Connemara!" "Not quite so strong a resemblance, perhaps," replied Mr Meldrum, smiling.
Yet their amazement, great though it may have been, was not greater than that of "His Majesty." For an instant he stood like one transfixed, and then exclaimed, in that peculiar English which he spoke, "Howly Moses! but this bates the worruld!" and then stood staring at each of them. At this exclamation Katie started. She recognized the voice at once; and, strange to say, all her terror fled.
"I'm thinkin'," O'Hagan pursued, calmly ignoring the presence of the outsiders, "thot these do be the soot that domned thafe av the worruld stole off ye the day, sor. A la-ad brought ut at ayeleven o'clock, sor, wid particular rayquist thot ut be daylivered to ye at once. The paper's tore, an' " "O'Hagan," Maitland ordered sharply, "undo that parcel. I think I can satisfy you now, sleuth.
"His Majesty" had also been tasting, and with every taste the royal mind seemed to assume a new phase. "In our coort," said "His Majesty," "as at prisint constichooted, we cannot offer the injuicemints that are held forth at Vienna, Berlin, an' St. Paytersburg; but we can furnish some lads that can bate the worruld. I'd like to howld a coort an' have the ladies. We'd have a ball.
It makes all the differ in the worruld whether a man's only a tailor wid a small 't' or a Merchant Tailor wid capital letters." "We keep our own carriage," continued Mrs. Russell, bridling and tossing her head, "and we have our own coat of arms and crest the Russell arms, you know, the same as the Duke of Bedford." "'Dade!" said "His Majesty," "so ye have the Russell arrums.
It's better to me nor anything else in the worruld, when it wouldn't be a sup o' summat now and thin, if I'd have the rheumatiz." "A sup of what?" "Medicine, dear, medicine that I take whin the doctor says it's good for me. May you niver know the want of it, nor of anything in the wide worruld! and niver know what it is to be poor!"
Upon this a voice rang out, full and clear, in the room: "Begorra, an' that same they'll do. Whoroo, lads! this bates the worruld, so it does. It's mesilf that's stud by the dure for the last tin minutes, an' I've seen a soight that I won't forget till me dyin' day.
The detachment of Royal Artillery, whose quarters my road leads directly past, is composed largely of the gallant sons of Erin, and as I wheel into the cantonment, an artilleryman seated on a eharpoy beneath a spreading neem-tree, sings out to his comrades, "Be jabbers, bhoys; here's the Yankee phat's travellin' around the worruld wid a bicycle."
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