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'What, Mr Whilks! cried Mrs Gamp. 'Don't say it's you, Mr Whilks, and that poor creetur Mrs Whilks with not even a pincushion ready. Don't say it's you, Mr Whilks! 'It isn't Mr Whilks, said Pecksniff. 'I don't know the man. Nothing of the kind. A gentleman is dead; and some person being wanted in the house, you have been recommended by Mr Mould the undertaker.
Larcom, the grave butler of Brandon, wearing outside his portly person a black garment then known as a 'zephyr, a white choker, and black trousers, and well polished, but rather splay shoes, and, on the whole, his fat and serious aspect considered, being capable of being mistaken for a church dignitary, or at least for an eminent undertaker, entered the room with a solemn and gentlemanlike reverence.
When Anna and Babi met next day it was with the usual coldness and the accustomed smile. By trade he was an undertaker. His name was Sami Witschi. He was very tall and thin, with a slight stoop, and he had the clean-shaven solemn face of an old peasant. He was very pious and knew better than any one all the tittle-tattle of the parish.
He remembered the great flags waving triumphantly over Fifth Avenue, and the crowds dutifully cheering. But those were valid reasons for the undertaker; but for him, John Andrews, were they valid reasons? No. He had no trade, he had not been driven into the army by the force of public opinion, he had not been carried away by any wave of blind confidence in the phrases of bought propagandists.
It was right down awkward, and nobody didn't seem to know what to do. But pretty soon they see that long-legged undertaker make a sign to the preacher as much as to say, "Don't you worry just depend on me." Then he stooped down and begun to glide along the wall, just his shoulders showing over the people's heads.
Gerald, living uncomplainingly in this dreadful little country town, enduring Western conditions with such dignity, and loving his little wife despite her undertaker father, would be seriously disgusted, she knew, if she gave him a daughter. "A a girl?" Clara stammered, her wet eyes on the doctor's face, her panting little figure lost in the big outline of her mother's spare-room bed.
The dinner bell could be heard faintly in the other parts of the building. "Well, what d'you think of it, undertaker?" said Andrews. "Nothing." "Why?" The undertaker turned his small black eyes on Andrews and looked him straight in the face. "You know what's the matter with me, don't yer, outside o' this wound?" "No." "Coughing like I am, I'd think you'd be more observant.
The struggle began as purely physical; as man evolved it shifted ground to the mental, psychic, and the spiritual, with a few dashes of cave-man proclivities still left. But depend upon it, the struggle will always be life is activity. And when it gets to be a struggle in well-doing, it will still be a struggle. When inertia gets the better of you it is time to telephone to the undertaker.
His hostess gazed after him and slowly shook her head. "Miss Martha, Miss Martha." Martha turned, to find Primmie excitedly gesticulating. "Didn't I tell you? Didn't I tell you?" whispered Primmie. "Didn't you tell me what? Stop wigglin'." "Yes'm. Didn't I tell you 'undertaker'?" "Undertaker. Him, the Bangs one. Yesterday 'twas remains, to-day it's graveyards. My savin' soul, I " "Hush, hush!
The jokers had found no trouble in securing the necessary tools to carry out their joke. Money will buy anything, even an undertaker for a living man. The promise of secrecy and generous fees brought all they needed.
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