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"You come 'long o' Ching, I showee something velly nice ploper." "All right," I cried. "Now, Tanner, go and try it on with the doctor." "No, no. Ask offlicer. Doctor only give flizzick. Velly nastee. Ugh!" Ching's round face was a study as he screwed it up to show his disgust with the doctor's preparations. Barkins went off and returned directly.

"Oh deah me!" said Ching in his most squeaky tones, "I velly hungly. You like nicee bleakfast, Mis' Hellick?" "Don't speak to me as if I were a baby, Ching," I cried angrily. "No; speak like to offlicer, Mr Hellick. You likee bleakfast something good eat?"

"We don't want to take you on board without any head." "But they daren't hurt us," cried Smith bumptiously. "We're Englishmen, and our gunboat is in the river. I'm not afraid. Why, there'd be a war if one of these men interfered with us. Our people would land and burn up the place." "No," said Ching quietly. "Send letter to mandalin. Why you men cut off little offlicer head?"

Barkins and I picked up each something to throw at the round, smooth, smiling face thrust in at the door, which was held close to the neck, so that we saw a head and nothing more. "No flow thing at Ching," the Chinaman said softly. "Offlicer don't flow thing. Ching come in?" "Yes," said Barkins, "come in. What is it?"

"Ching just come ask young genelman likee walkee walkee." "Yes, allee likee walkee walkee velly much," said Barkins, imitating the Chinaman's squeak. "Why? Can you give us leave?" Ching shook his head. "Go ask offlicer. Go for walkee walkee, take Ching; you likee see something velly nice ploper?" "Yes," I cried eagerly. "Can you take us to see a Chinese theatre?" Ching closed his eyes and nodded.

"Here, who are you calling little officer, Pigtail?" cried Smith indignantly. "Mean young offlicer," cried Ching hastily. "Say, Why you men cut chop young offlicer head off? Mandalin say, Velly solly. He find out who blave was who chop young offlicer head, and give him lichi." "You mean toco?" said Barkins. "No; lichi." "What's lichi?" I said.

"Come long quickee," he whispered excitedly. "Very big blave that fellow. Killee fightee man. You no 'flaid of him?" "Afraid? No," said Barkins shortly. "There, let's have this tea." Ching glanced round once, and we were about to imitate his example, but he said excitedly "No, no, don't lookee. Big blave talkee talkee soldier, and tink Inglis offlicer 'flaid. Walkee past."

"You come have bleakfast 'long o' Ching. Ching velly glad to see you; Ching pay." "What? nonsense!" cried Smith, while we others stared. "Yes; Ching plenty money. Captain gave Ching plenty plize-money; make him velly happy to see young offlicer to bleakfast." "Oh, but we can't let him pay for us, Smithy," cried Barkins. "No, of course not," we chorussed.

He's the chap as come aboard yesterday." "Yes," I panted as I sat up, breathing painfully, "it's Ching. He's our friend." "Yes, flend, evelibody fiend," cried Ching. "Wantee go shore. Fancee shop." "Go ashore?" said the officer. "Yes, walkee shore." "But if I set you ashore amongst that howling mob, they'll cut you to pieces." "Ching 'flaid so. Allee bad man. Wantee kill young offlicer."

"So they are," said Barkins. "But I say, Ching, are you a good sailor?" The Chinaman shook his head. "Ching velly good man, keep fancee shop. Ching not sailor." "He means, can you go to sea without being sick?" I said, laughing. He gave us a comical look. "Don'tee know. Velly nicee now. Big offlicer say jolly sailor take gleat care Ching, and give hammock go to sleep.