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'It was an expedition, says th' dillygate fr'm England, 'to serve th' high moral jooties iv Christyan civvylization. 'Thin, says th' dillygate fr'm Chiny, puttin' on his hat, 'I'm f'r war, he says. 'It ain't so rough, he says. An' he wint home." "Well, sir," said Mr. Dooley, "onaisy lies th' crown on anny king's head these days.
"I learned Schwartzmeister th' Shan-van-Voght before we was through; an' I've got th' German naytional chune be heart, 'Ich vice nit wauss allus bay doitan'. What'll ye have to drink, Jawn?" And, as Mr. McKenna went out, he heard his friend muttering: "Freed be th' Dutch! Freed be the Dutch! An' we niver give thim so much as a dillygate."
'Ye haven't sthruck? says she, hope sthrugglin' with fear in her face. 'Ye've guessed it, says he. 'We weren't exactly ordhered out. Th' signal f'r a sthrike was to be a series iv sharp whistles fr'm the walkin' dillygate, but, whin that didn't come an' we were tired iv waitin' th' report iv th' baseball game come over th' wires an' we mistook that f'r a signal.
Th' English dillygate said that while much cud be said against a practice which personally seemed to him rather unsportsmanlike, still he felt he must reserve th' right iv anny cannybal allies iv Brittanya to go as far as they liked. Th' Hon'orable Joe Choate moved that in future wars no military band shud be considered complete without a base-dhrum. Carrid.
'We're all profissors iv colledges or lawyers whin we're home, he says. 'Is it war to shoot my aunt? says th' dillygate fr'm Chiny. Cries iv 'No, no. 'Is it war to hook me father's best hat that he left behind whin he bashfully hurrid away to escape th' attintions iv Europeen sojery? he says. 'Is robbery war? says he. 'Robbery is a nicissry part iv war, says th' English dillygate.
'I am in favor, howiver, iv restrictin' their use to encounters with races that we properly considher infeeryor, he says. Th' dillygate fr'm Sinagambya rose to a question iv privilege. 'State ye'er question iv privilege, says th' chairman. 'I wud like to have th' windows open, says th' dillygate fr'm Sinagambya. 'I feel faint, he says.
There's th' same not gettin' up till ye want to, th' same meetin' ye'er frinds f'r th' first time in their good clothes an' th' same thumpin' sthrangers over th' head with a brick. Afther awhile th' main guy comes home fr'm th' seaside, raises wages twinty per cent, fires th' boss an' takes in th' walkin' dillygate as a specyal partner.
"I've often thought I'd like to have th' walkin' dillygate iv th' Liquor Dealers' Binivolent Assocyation come around an' ordher me to lay down me lemon squeezer an' bung starter an' walk out. But nawthin' iv th' kind iver happens an' if it did happen no wan wud care a sthraw.
Th' meetin' was opened with an acrimonyous debate over a resolution offered be a dillygate fr'm Paryguay callin' f'r immeejit disarmamint, which is th' same, Hinnissy, as notifyin' th' Powers to turn in their guns to th' man at th' dure. This was carrid be a very heavy majority. Among those that voted in favor iv it were: Paryguay, Uryguay, Switzerland, Chiny, Bilgium, an' San Marino.
Dooley, "till they asphalt it an' run th' boats on throlleys." "Ye haven't sthruck yet, have ye?" said Mr. Dooley. "Not yet," said Mr. Hennessy. "But th' dillygate was up at th' mills to-day an' we may be called out anny minyit now." "Will ye go?" asked Mr. Dooley. "Ye bet I will," said Mr. Hennessy. "Ye just bet I will.
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