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Sound the trumpet, Philotas; sound, and let every body know that the wonderful Doctor Appallacheosmocommetico has vouchsafed to stop here and confer his blessings upon the inhabitants of this town."
"Gentlemen and ladies I have the honour to announce to you the arrival in this town of the celebrated Doctor Appallacheosmocommetico, who has travelled farther than the sun and faster than a comet. He hath visited every part of the globe.