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Then he removed the cutlery, heaved a deep sigh, and enquired: "Who at, ma?" "What's that?" "Who'll I go courtin' at?" "Skim, you 'member in thet las' book we read, 'The Angel Maniac's Revenge, there was a sayin' that fate knocks wunst on ev'ry man's door. Well, fate's knockin' on your door." Skim listened, with a nervous glance toward the doorway. Then he shook his head.
I took a ham wunst up to the sanitarium for a young sprig of a doctor that was too proud to carry it himself. He was goin' that way, too walkin' up to save money so I charged him for carryin' up the ham just what I'd have took both for. 'Pigs is high, I told him, 'same price for one as for 'nother, but he didn't pay no attention to it an' never raised no kick about the price.
"I guided him hyar, like old Sim Roxby axed me ter do, an' that's all. I ain't keerin' ef I never lay eyes on him again," he said to himself. "Going?" said Dundas, pleasantly, noticing the motion. "You'll look in again, won't you?" "Wunst in a while, I reckon," drawled Keenan, a trifle thrown off his balance by this courtesy.
"Well, sir, to be short, I was kept in that place all day long, and when night come I was druv into a shay at the point of the pistil, and rattled along as fast as the horses could gallop over a road as I knew nothing of. We changed horses wunst or twict, and just about the dawn of day we come to a broad river with a vessel laying to, not far from the shore.
"Now don't, Slick," said he, "now don't set me off, that's a good fellow." "'Mr Slick, said a young lady of about twelve years of age to me wunst, 'do you know what gray wackey is? for I do. "'Don't I, sais I; 'I know it to my cost. Lord! how my old master used to lay it on! "'Lay it on! she said, 'I thought it reposed on a primitive bed.
"Why, that's nothing in this here business," she said. "It happens every wunst in a while, when you was running the mangles and was tired. That's the way it was with me: I was clean done out, one Saturday night, and I jist couldn't see no more; and first thing I know Wo-o-ow! and that hand went right straight clean into the rollers. And I was jist tired, that's all.
"Of course, I ain't so ignorant as all that I've traveled about the country, been to Asheville wunst, and to Waynesville a heap o' times and I know the theory. Theory says 't revenue is a tax on luxury. Waal, that's all right anything in reason. The big fellers that makes lots of money out o' stillin', and lives in luxury, ought to pay handsome for it.
Ben dunno how it mought strike folks ef they war ter know ez the witch-face hed been gin over ter sech cur'ous ways all of a suddenty. They mought take it fur a sign agin the road, sech ez b'lieves in the witch-face givin' bad luck." After a pause, "Then I viewed it wunst, wunst in the dead o' the night.
I suppose we mustn't think o' the Waldorf what?" "Huh!" snorted Miss Kirk, "not for mine, if I owned the mint! I bin to the Waldorf wunst, of course. I went just out of curiosity to see how the swells et. Wunst is enough, like goin' to the menagerie.
Him, a big, strong man that had made a gangster eat his gun and ordered the judge and sheriff what to do! The idea! Him letting a midget order him around! What we need here is a good cusser-outer." "You're too late," said Landy dryly. "You've missed yer appointment by about forty years. We had a party up state wunst, that filled all yer requirements. Hit was a woman.
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