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"Well then, bein' nuss to Merry, I used to take 'er out long walks in the fields among the flowers, an' I was used to catch butterflies and beetles for 'er, an' brought 'em home an' stuck pins through 'em an' made c'lections; an' oh, I did like to scuttle about the green lanes an' chase the cows, an' roll on the grass in the sunshine with Merry, an' tear an bu'st my trousers, for w'ich I got spanked by the Brute, but didn't care a rap, because that brought me double allowance o' coddlin' from Aunt Georgie.
Now she had forgotten her only auditor, a wide-eyed little girl, and was fairly launched upon monologue, the subject answering as well as another her imperious need. "Which of Pa's sisters, Ma?" I asked, interrupting. "W'ich of his sisters w'at? Wat you talkin' 'bout now?" "Which is the good-looking one?" "Oh, your Aunt Em'ly, o' course.
Tilda took a turn at considering. "The further I go on this v'yage," she announced, "w'ich, per'aps, 'twould be truthfuller to say the longer it takes the more I seems to get mixed up in other folks' business. But you've done me a good turn, Sam Bossom; an' you've been open with me; an' I reckon I got to keep you straight in this 'ere. There! put up yer verses while I sit an' think it out."
But, to return from this digression: Mrs Foster was congratulating herself on having discovered the error in her accounts, when the door opened and a stout florid woman, of fifty or thereabouts, with a shiny red skin, presented herself and said: "Please, ma'am, here's a gentleman as wants to see you, and won't go away, though I told him you was at tea, w'ich is a fact, though it had no impression whatever on him, such is his imprence, goin' for to reflect on my character for truth, as never told a lie since I was a baby in long frocks, so I didn't; but it's always the way with these men that go tax-gatherin', though I don't know that he's that neether, so I don't; what shall I say, ma'am?"
So Tenie had ter git in de buggy en go 'long wid young Mars Dunkin ter his plantation, w'ich wuz mo' d'n twenty mile away; en dey want no chance er her seein' Sandy no mo' tel she come back home. De po' gal felt monst'us bad erbout de way things wuz gwine on, en she knowed Sandy mus' be a wond'rin' why she didn' come en turn 'im back no mo'.
See that mare goin' pas' you w'en she's in a hurry an' you say to yo'se'f, you say, 'Yere you is, bound fur de buryin'-groun', but how come you got separated frum the hearse? Purfessor, that mare's entitled Christian name is Mittie May. Did you ever hear of ary thing on fo' laigs, ur two, w'ich answered to the name of Mittie May that wuz tricky?"
"Jedge," he said, drawing a pace or two nearer his employer, "did you ever hear tell of a pale-yaller party w'ich calls hisse'f Doct' J. Talbott Duvall dat come yere a few weeks ago?" "Ah, hah!" said the judge as though satisfied of the correctness of a prior conclusion. "I thought possibly my mind might be on the right track. Yes, I've heard of him and I've seen him. Whut of him?"
Byrne, she is the best girl that you or I ever saw we're not fit to breathe the same air that she breathes. Now you can see why I should like to go first." "I t'ought youse was soft on her," replied the mucker, "an' dat's de reason w'y youse otter not go first; but wot's de use o' chewin', les flip a coin to see w'ich goes an w'ich stays got one?"
Do you suppose that that babby could go through life like an or'nary babby? No, it couldn't not even if it was to try w'ich it won't!" Having uttered this prophecy the cook resumed the contemplation of his bubbling coppers. "Well, I suppose you're right, John Johnson," said the steward. "Yes, I'm right, Tom Thomson," returned the cook, with the nod and air of a man who is never wrong.
'Ows'ever, to make a long story short, 'as 'Amlet said to 'is father's ghost, w'ich was prince of Timbuctoo, I do know Mr Sparks, and I can give 'im into the 'ands of the p'lice wot then?" Oh! you have no idea what a blessing it would be to to to a poor, dear girl who is mad infatuated and, and then, he is such a scoundrel; such a fire-raiser, deceiver, villain "
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