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I leapt up, flung Heineccius fairly in the fire, ran to her side, and cast an arm round her sobbing body. She put me from her sharply. "You do not love your friend," says she. "I could be so happy too, if you would let me!" And then, "O, what will I have done that you should hate me so?" "Hate you!" cries I, and held her firm. "You blind lass, can you not see a little in my wretched heart?
What is to become of us? the other which steeled me again to resolution. But prayer is not very difficult, and the hitch comes in practice. In her presence, and above all if I allowed any beginning of familiarity, I found I had very little command of what should follow. But to sit all day in the same room with her, and feign to be engaged upon Heineccius, surpassed my strength.
"Thank you kindly for these same good hours," said she, on a deep note of her voice. The concern in which I fell instantly on this address, put me with the same swiftness on my guard; and we were no sooner in the chamber, and the light made, than she beheld the old, dour, stubborn countenance of the student of Heineccius.
Now she would be gazing in the fire, and then again at me; and at that I would be plunged in a terror of myself, and turn the pages of Heineccius like a man looking for the text in church. Suddenly she called out aloud, "O, why does not my father come?" she cried, and fell at once into a storm of tears.
We had our walk daily. Out in the streets I felt more safe; I relaxed a little in my guardedness; and for one thing, there was no Heineccius. This made these periods not only a relief to myself, but a particular pleasure to my poor child. When I came back about the hour appointed, I would generally find her ready dressed and glowing with anticipation.
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