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"Ah, then, isn't it yourself has the illigant time of it, Father dear!" said he, tapping him familiarly upon his ample paunch, "and nothing to trouble you; the best of divarsion wherever you go, and whether it's Badahos or Ballykilruddery, it's all one; the women is fond of ye.
It's the like of you that makes ruffians of the boys about; they isn't left the manes of living, not even of getting the dhry pratees; and when they tries to make out the rint with the whiskey, which is not for themselves but for them as is your own friends, you hunts them through the mountains and bogs like worried foxes; and not that only; but for them as does it, and them as does not be doing it, is all the same; and it's little the masther, or, for the like of that, the masther's daughter either, will be getting from being so thick with sich as you, harrowing and sazing his tenants jist for your own fun and divarsion.
By jing, it's the divil's own divarsion; for you might as well get a stroke of a sledge as a blow from one of them able, hard-working fellows, with hands upon them like lime-stone. When the fellow that's down gets it hot and heavy, the man that struck him stands bent in his place, and some friend of the other comes down upon him, and pays him for what the other fellow got.
Another day, prompted by a desire to amuse her, Michael introduced into her room a fat mongrel puppy with disproportionate legs and an alarmed expression. His wish to provide her with what he was pleased to call a "divarsion" was, like many of his other good intentions, not entirely successful.
"What did you fire at us for?" said Bob. "I never fired at you. I was firing for my own diversion," answered Mr. Sloper. "D' ye load with stones for your divarsion, as ye call it?" said Bob. "There was no stones when you came along," cried the tailor. "Why did you aggrevate me by firing in return?"
'Bite on that, Peg Barney, I sez; 'the night is settin' frosty, an' you'll be wantin' divarsion before the mornin'. But for the Rig'lations you'd be bitin' on a bullet now at the thriangles, Peg Barney, sez I. "All the draf' was out av their tents watchin' Barney bein' pegged. "''Tis agin the Rig'lations!
She kept him in a cupboard, and out of the cupboard he'd pop if it was a crack open, an' into the milk pans he'd be, or under the beds, or pullin' the stool from under you, or at some other divarsion.
'Where 'd ye wurruk last? 'Why, says th' Loot, 'I'm th' man that sunk th' ship, he says; 'an' I've been kissed be hundherds iv women at home, he says. 'Is that so? says Cousin George. 'Well, I don't b'lieve in sinkin' me own ship, he says. 'Whin I'm lookin' f'r a divarsion iv that kind, I sink somebody else's, he says. ''Tis cheaper.
Wanst, bein' a fool, I wint into the married lines more for the sake av spakin' to our ould color-sergint Shadd than for any thruck wid womenfolk. I was a corp'ril then rejuced aftherward, but a corp'ril then. I've got a photograft av mesilf to prove ut. 'You'll take a cup av tay wid us? sez Shadd. 'I will that, I sez, 'tho' tay is not my divarsion.
'Amen, says he, 'whether you're joking or not. The moment he said that my mind was relieved, for I knew it was not a sperit, and I began to laugh heartily at my mistake; 'and who are ye at all? said I, 'that's roving about, at this hour of the night, ye can't be Father Luke, for I left him asleep on the carpet before I quitted the college, and faith, my friend, if you hadn't the taste for divarsion ye would not be out now? He coughed then so hard that I could not make out well what he said, but just perceived that he had lost his way on the common, and was a little disguised in liquor.
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