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But very slowly, month by month, he had gained a second impression which seemed to him deeper and more real. To the eye they were grown women all, but inwardly they were children still, each groping for her happiness and each held back as he had been, either by checks within herself or by the gay distractions of the absorbing city. He saw each of his daughters, parts of himself.
Committed, as it were, to this charming and clever young woman, who, by becoming for him a domestic resource, had become for him practically a new person and committed, especially, in his own house, which somehow made his sense of it a deeper thing he took an interest in seeing how far the connection could carry him, could perhaps even lead him, and in thus putting to the test, for pleasant verification, what Fanny Assingham had said, at the last, about the difference such a girl could make.
You are my France, and I will have no other." Joan smiled, and was touched and pleased at the man's grave enthusiasm solemn enthusiasm, one may call it, for the manner of it was deeper than mere gravity and she said: "Well, it shall be as you will. What are you called?" The man answered with unsmiling simplicity: "They call me the Dwarf, but I think it is more in jest than otherwise."
But whole months had passed without any such thought; and during these long interludes the healthy country scenes about her, and the common causes for smiles and tears in a child's life, filled her consciousness. Still, the undercurrent of the deeper life was there, and very small incidents were strong enough to bring it to the surface.
But he showed that he had already some idea of style; and if, when he had so little to say, he could say it with so much semblance of power, it was certain that when he had observed and thought for himself he would go further and make a deeper mark.
Yet it is now certain that most of our deeper feelings are superindividual, both those which we classify as passional, and those which we call sublime. The individuality of the amatory passion is absolutely denied by science; and what is true of love at first sight is also true of hate: both are superindividual.
I suppose that I put into my observation of Nature and perhaps into my hearing of music the same thing that many people experience only in their relations with other people. To myself relations with others are cheerful enough, interesting, perplexing but seldom absorbing, or overwhelming; such experiences never seem to say the ultimate word or to sound the deeper depth.
Was his apparent friendliness merely a blind, or did it hide some still deeper purpose, of which at present I knew nothing? He must have guessed my thoughts, for leaning back in his chair he remarked half-mockingly: "Come, Mr. Lyndon, it doesn't pay to be too suspicious.
"But all faults can be redeemed, unhappy child!" "But the recollection of the stain madame, does it not become more and more terrible in measure as the mind is purified, as the soul becomes elevated? Alas! the more you mount the deeper appears the abyss from which you have emerged." "Then you renounce all hope of re-establishment and pardon?"
Though predisposing factors, such as faulty conformation, are often to be reckoned with, exciting causes predominate more frequently in any given number of cases. The noble tendency of the horse to serve its master under the stress of pain, even to the point of complete exhaustion and sudden death, should win for these willing servants a deeper consideration of their welfare.