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Her female slave set out the great table, and placed upon it cups of the very coarsest blue ware, a little brown sugar in one, and a tiny drop of milk in another, no butter, though the lady assured us she had a "deary" and two cows. Instead of butter, she "hoped we would fix a little relish with our crackers," in ancient English, eat salt meat and dry biscuits.
"Sh!" came from that source: "or them fools down there, eatin' crackers an' cheese, 'll hear ye." "I don't care if the whole town hears me," replied a passionate female voice. "You said I could have twenty dollars, and now you won't give it to me. I won't play to-night till I do have it hear that!" "Sh! or I'll shake ye! Don't make a fool o' yourself, Maud. Wait till I get to-night's receipts "
"A man was giving a celebration one Fourth of July to a lot of children. He had ordered a lot of firecrackers, but they didn't come. So he sent a telegram to the wholesale house in the city. 'Send big and little crackers as ordered at once. About an hour afterwards he got a return telegram which said, 'Our grocery department is closed to-day. Your order for crackers will be filled to-morrow."
"Didn't I come and sit by you and smoke and see it all done?" "No!" cried the second mate angrily. "Well, you Englishmen can tell crackers when you like. What about that big cask with the holes in?" "That cask? Was that yours?" "Of course it was, and all the rest of the things on that truck," said the American coolly.
He, he, he! Putty rough, ain't it?" "It is, rather," said John, laughing. "I'm afraid my endurance is pretty well at an end. Elright's wife is ill, and the fact is, that since day before yesterday I have been living on what I could buy at the grocery crackers, cheese, salt fish, canned goods, et cetera." "Scat my !" cried David. "Wa'al! Wa'al! That's too dum'd bad!
"Were you thinking of going shopping?" he asked, and at the very ludicrousness of the notion she laughed again. She discovered a keen relish for this kind of humour, but it was new to her experience, and she could not cope with it. "Only to buy some crackers, or a sandwich," she replied, and blushed. "Oh," he said. "Down in the village, on the corner where the cars stop, is a restaurant.
And there they each ate a bowl of crackers and milk with a baked apple, using the arms of their chairs for tables. Pope's bill was forty cents, and, strangely enough, not even when he paid it did he remember that this was the woman for whose company at supper other men paid five hundred dollars.
When done, the skin and feathers will easily peel off, and the flesh will be found to be wonderfully sweet, tender, and juicy. A stuffing of pounded crackers and minced meat of any kind, with plenty of seasoning, greatly improves the result, or the Indian meal may be used if desired. A fowl thus roasted is a rare delicacy.
I followed her, and found out where her grandfather lived. So one night I opened four gallons of prime New Yorkers, put 'em in a kettle, took a lot of crackers and soft bread, and started for the Frenchman's. The little gal came to the door, and showed me up stairs. The poor old customer was all alone, in bed, and yaller as a blanket. He start up ven he see us, and exclaimed, "Ah! mon Dieu!
The Baron laughed at all this vulgar nonsense, but he did not always follow it readily, so that his laughter sounded like the forgotten crackers that go off after fireworks. We all live in a sphere of some kind, and the inhabitants of every sphere are endowed with an equal share of curiosity. Next evening at the opera, Esther's reappearance was the great news behind the scenes.
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