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We went off to do her bidding, and left her muttering, "And what folks as can edicate their own children sends 'em all out of the house for, passes me; to come back looking like a damp handkerchief, with dear knows what cheap living and unwholesome ways, and want of native air." Cook's bark was worse than her bite.
I have hung fish high in trees more times than phonographs have hanged Danny Deever. So we fished little that first evening, and, on the discovery that candles had been left out of the cook's outfit, we retired early to our bough beds, which were, as it happened that night, of class A.
Little did he dream of the existence of a certain group of islands, thousands of miles away, where in subsequent days there would arise a curious suit at law, when an old chief of Maui would be charged with defamation of character because he persisted in asserting that his body was the living repository of Captain Cook's great toe.
Knowing what we now know, that all off this coast is a continuous line of reefs and shoals, Cook's action in standing off might seem rash. But he knew nothing of this.
Yet many Indian warriors were struck down by the bullets of their pursuers, and the horses and camp furniture of the savages, such as it was, fell into the hands of Colonel Cook's party. Mr. Carson describing these events says: "To Captain Sykes, who commanded the infantry, is due the greatest amount of praise for the part he acted in our adventures.
"My dear boy," he replied; "take my advice, if ever you get married, arrange it so that the honeymoon shall only last a week, and let it be a bustling week into the bargain. Take a Cook's circular tour. Get married on the Saturday morning, cut the breakfast and all that foolishness, and catch the eleven-ten from Charing Cross to Paris. Take her up the Eiffel Tower on Sunday.
Tea at Cook's was the alternative to a study tea. There was a large room at the back of the shop, and here oceans of hot tea and tons of toast were consumed. The staff of Cook's consisted of Mr. Cook, late sergeant in a line regiment, six foot three, disposition amiable, left leg cut off above the knee by a spirited Fuzzy in the last Soudan war; Mrs.
"Really," she exclaimed to her husband, "if Jacko goes on so, I shall be of cook's mind, and not wish to live in the house with him." One day, Jacko observed nurse washing out some fine clothes for her mistress, and seemed greatly interested in the suds which she made in the progress of her work. Watching his chance, he went to Mrs.
Thus ended Mr. Cook's first voyage round the world, in which he had gone through so many dangers, explored so many countries, and exhibited the strongest proofs of his possessing an eminently sagacious and active mind; a mind that was equal to every perilous enterprise, and to the boldest and most successful efforts of navigation and discovery.
I was beginning to despair when I saw Cook's man, who was, as usual, hovering about to assist travellers in trouble, and I beckoned him to approach. "See that gentleman," I nodded towards the Colonel. "He wants you; do your best for him." And when the tourist agent proceeded on his mission to be accosted, I fear rather unceremoniously, I slipped off and hid out of sight.
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