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But I know what I kin see an' hear an', b'jinks, I'm still doubtin' I'm ever goin' to hear that there Eddy's son do this talkin'. But get busy, lads; get busy!" "Oh, fudge, Dad! Can't you see they're dreadfully busy? You can't hurry them one bit faster." Grace was ever just. "No," said Skeets, who had borrowed Bill's crutch to get into the shop for a little while. "No, Mr.
Farmeress wipes her hand on her apron and rubbers through her specs. Then, lo and look ye! Up the road from the other way jogs Parleyvoo Pickens in a gig, dressed in black, white necktie, long face, sniffing his nose, emitting a spurious kind of noise resembling the long meter doxology. "B'jinks!" says farmer, "if thar ain't a preacher now!" It transpires that I am Rev.
I been borned a long time goin' on to seventy year now, an' I seen all sorts of contraptions like reapers an' binders, ridin' plows, typewritin'-machines, telephones, phonygraphs, flyin'-machines, submarines an' all such, but b'jinks, I ain't a-believin' that nobody kin hear jes' common talk through the air without no wires. An' hundreds o' miles! 'Tain't natch'all an' 'taint possible now, is it?"
Listen to me, now, fer a minute: If you fellers kin rig up a machine to fetch old man Eddy's son's talk right here about two hundred an' fifty mile, I'll hand out to each o' you a good hundred dollars; yes, b'jinks. I'll make it a couple a hun " "No, Mr. Hooper, we value your friendship altogether too much to take your money and that's too much like a wager, anyway." Bill was most earnest.
An' oh, you kin laugh, Ma Hooper, b'jinks, but I reckon you're as proud o' these here young Eddy's son's sons as I be. Now, Mister Bill an' Mister Gus, you kin bet all these folks'd like to have a few words. Now, as they say in prayer meetin', 'Mister Bill Brown'll lead us in a speech. Hooray!" Bill seized his crutch, got it carefully under his arm and arose.
An', b'jinks, if you spring anything extry fine an' highfalutin I'll double it make it two thousand; anything to help 'em along, gettin' an eddication, which I ain't got, ner never kin git, but my gal shall an' all her young friends. So, go to it, folks, an' I'm thinkin' my friends, Bill an' Gus " Roaring cheers interrupted the earnest speaker. He smiled broadly and sat down.
"Johnny spread this tarpaulin by the fire expressly for me to recline here and think and smoke and b'jinks! I'm going to! After buying me two shirts yesterday and tobacco to-day to say nothing of bringing home an unknown chicken for invalid stew, I can't with decency offend him." "I can't see why he's taken such a tremendous shine to you!" complained Diane mockingly.
An' now count up just what you lads have lost; the hull sum total, b'jinks! I'm goin' to be the insurance comp'ny in this deal." "The insurance company!" Bill exclaimed and Gus stared. "Sure. Goin' to make up your loss an' then some. I'm a heap int'rested in this Eddy's son business, ain't I? Think I ain't wantin' to see that there contraption that hears a hunderd miles off?
So I says: 'You kids kin go ahead, I says, an' these blame boys they went ahead an' shucks! you all see what they, Bill an' Gus, has done. You fellers has got to have a lot o' credit an' you are goin' to git it! "Now, my wife she don't think I'm any good at makin' a speech an 'I ain't, but I'm a-makin' it jes' the same fer these boys, Bill an' Gus, b'jinks!
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