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"Well, somewhat in this fashion: W'enever he opens the door I'll clap my hand on his mouth to stop his pipe, and you'll slip behind him, throw yer arms about him, and hold on till I tie a handkerchief over his mouth. Arter that we'll tie his hands and feet with whatever we can git hold of his own necktie, mayhap take the keys from him, and git out the best way we can."
"The w'ite man he wuks fur is got one an' Jeffy gits the borrowin' use of her it's a mare w'enever he want to, ez I knows frum whut he tells me an' frum whut I seen. Purfessor, that mare is jes' natchelly ordained an' cut out fur peradin' broad ez a feather-tick, gentle ez the onborn lamb, an' mouty nigh pyure white perzactly the right color fur a gran' marshal's hoss.
De leaves on de groun' 'uz so wet dey don't make no fuss, en I got in de woods, en w'enever I year de Yankees gwine by, I des stop in my tracks en let un pass. I wuz stan'in' dat away in de aidge er de woods lookin' out cross a clearin', w'en piff! out come a little bunch er blue smoke fum de top er wunner dem big lonesome-lookin' pines, en den pow!
She attends temperance meetin's an' takes people there a'most drags 'em in by the scruff o' the neck. She keeps 'er eyes open, like a weasel, an' w'enever she sees a chance o' what she calls pluckin' a brand out o' the fire, she plucks it, without much regard to burnin' 'er fingers.
"I'll keep de mule an' de kyart an' de harness fac', I'll have ter keep 'em, 'cause I ain't got no others. But dey 're gwine ter be yo'n ez much ez mine. W'enever you wants anything hauled, er wants yo' lot ploughed, er anything dat's yo' mule, an' I'm yo' man an' yo' mammy's."
I do b'lieve there's some 'xtraord'nary critter in them there mountains for I've lived nigh forty years, off and on, in these parts, an' I've always obsarved that in this wurld w'enever ye find anythin' ye've always got somethin'. Nobody never got hold o' somethin' an' found afterwards that it wos nothin'. So I b'lieve there's somethin' in this wild man how much I dun know."
Bradford station, we'll say, 'as a call X Y Z, an' w'enever X Y Z sounds yeh know that's Bradford a-speakin'. So if yeh 'eerd X Y Z in London yeh'd know somethin' was wrong with Bradford. 'But if ther' hain't any, breaks in father, who was gettin' impatient. 'Shut up! will yeh? sez the doctor, 'till I git through. Well; all 'long that Bradford line yeh can give that Bradford call.
But ez I wuz a-sayin', dis yer Skundus growed up ter be a peart, lively kind er boy, en' wuz very well liked on de plantation. He never quo'lled wid de res' er de ban's en' alluz behaved 'isse'f en' tended ter his wuk. De only fault he had wuz his sleep'ness. He'd haf ter be woke up ev'y mawnin' ter go ter his wuk, en' w'enever he got a chance he'd fall ersleep.
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