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"Tchkk!" he clucked in gentle distaste "In uniform . . . an' just afther comin' off the thrain! . . . th' like av that now 'tis 'tis scandh'lus! . . ." Suddenly Redmond shivered, and his mirth died within him. The air seemed to have become charged with a tense, ominous something that filled him with a great dread of what? he knew not.
Nowadays they talk about th' edycation iv th' child befure they choose th' name. 'Tis: 'Th' kid talks in his sleep. 'Tis th' fine lawyer he'll make. Or, 'Did ye notice him admirin' that photygraph? He'll be a gr-reat journalist. Or, 'Look at him fishin' in Uncle Tim's watch pocket. We must thrain him f'r a banker. Or, 'I'm afraid he'll niver be sthrong enough to wurruk.
The supreme moment had really arrived some time before, but he is waiting for Farmer Brodigan with his daughter Kathleen, and the Widdy Sullivan, and a few other local worthies who are a 'thrifle late on him. Finally they come down the hill, and he paces up and down the station ringing the bell and uttering the warning cry, "This thrain never shtops! This thrain never shtops!
A pollytician always marries above his own station. That's wan sign that he'll be a successful pollytician. Th' throuble is, th' good woman stays planted just where she was, an' he goes by like a fast thrain by a whistlin' station. D'ye mind O'Leary, him that's a retired capitalist now, him that was aldherman, an' dhrainage thrustee, an' state sinitor f'r wan term?
'Good-by, Mike. 'Timothy, darlin', don't forget your prayers. 'Cornalius, if ye do but look out f'r th' little wans, th' big wans 'll not harm ye. 'Teddy, lad, always wear ye'er Agnus Day. An', whin th' time come f'r th' thrain to lave, th' girls was up to th' lines; an' 'twas, 'Mike, love, ye'll come back alive, won't ye? an' 'Pat, there does be a pair iv yarn socks in th' hoomp on ye'er back.
"So we wint up to our new station in that blazin' heat may the curse av Saint Lawrence conshume the man who gave the ordher! Will I iver forget that move? They gave us two wake thrains to the rigimint; an' we was eight hundher' and sivinty strong. There was A, B, C, an' D Companies in the secon' thrain, wid twelve women, no orficers' ladies, an' thirteen childher.
'Yes, he had put me on a thrain put me, palanquin an' all, an' six black assassins av his own coolies that was in his nefarious confidence, on the flat av a ballast-thruck, and we were rowlin' an' bowlin' along to Benares. Glory be that I did not wake up thin an' introjuce mysilf to the coolies. As I was sayin', I slept for the betther part av a day an' a night.
No wan hadn't seed um, an' they clum aboord th' thrain, cursin' an' swearin' vingince on Creed phwin they caught um. "Thin, maybe it's two wakes afther, we wuz settin' in Burrage's phwin th' dure bust open, an' in come Rad Cranston loike th' divil wuz afther um. "'They's a woild man, he yells, 'come out av th' woods, an' he's tearin' things up in Creed's cabin!
Exercise yez harse an'" he lit his pipe noisily "learn th' lay av th' thrails." He turned to the senior constable. "If ye can lay hould av th' J.P. there, get this shtiff committed an' let Ridmond take thrain wid um tu th' Post. Yu' return wid th' harses!" "Why can't Redmond nip down there on a way-freight and do the whole thing?" said Yorke, a trifle sulkily.
This thrain never shtops!" giving one the idea that eternity, instead of Killarney, must be the final destination of the passengers. The clock in the Ballyfuchsia telegraph and post office ceases to go for twenty-four hours at a time, and nobody heeds it, while the postman always has a few moments' leisure to lay down his knapsack of letters and pitch quoits with the Royal Irish Constabulary.