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''Ere, why don't you speak when you're spoke to, you lop-eared lager-beer barrel, you. Take your fice out o' that 'orse-flesh cat's-meat sossidge an' speak up, you baby-butcherin' hen-roost robber. 'That ain't no good, Smithy, Private Robinson pointed out. 'Y'see, callin' 'im 'ard names only makes 'im think 'e's got you angry like that 'e's drawed you.
"Here's the old news-paper," she used to say to my uncle. "Now don't go and get it in the butter, you silly old Sardine!" "What's the day of the week, Susan?" my uncle would ask. "Old Monday, Sossidge," she would say, and add, "I got all my Old Washing to do. Don't I KNOW it!"...
Come along er me an' get a cup er cawfee at a stand, an' buck up. If yer've give me that quid straight wish-yer-may-die I'll go with yer an' get a cup myself. I ain't 'ad a bite since yesterday an' 't wa'n't nothin' but a slice o' polony sossidge I found on a dust-'eap. Come on, mister." She pulled his coat with her cracked hand.
They did, and the Germans responded with 'The Watch on the Rhine. This time Private Robinson and the rest of the Towers recognised the song and capped it in great glee with 'Winding up the Watch on the Rhine, a parody which does not go out of its way to spare German feelings. 'An' 'ow d'you like that, ol' sossidge scoffers? demanded Private Robinson loudly.
He would have addressed his wife as 'Blow-fly, or 'Sossidge, or 'Piggins, or by any of the ridiculous names of the sort that he affected, in the presence of the queen or his own handy lad. I have overheard similar expressions of playful ribaldry upon his wife's lips many a time, but never when I was obviously and officially in their presence. 'And what about pay, Nickperry?
Next moment I heard his mellow, rotund voice again, several rooms away. 'Sossidge! Sossidge! Whajerdoin'? Then a pause. Then 'Keep brekfus' three minutes, Sossidge; I'm not dressed. With a mind somewhat confused, I turned to the red cow, and my first task for Mr. Perkins. Bella I learned subsequently that the cow, when a young heifer, had been given this name by Mr.
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