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Once, as they were going into the bathroom, Sang Huin kissed Seong Seob hurriedly before more men entered. Saeng Seob disliked the intrusive act that brought the acknowledgement of his aberration if not perversion into the light of day but the hot mouth was full of molecules and passing of molecules in a kiss was an intoxicating thing that took one away from the mundane aspects of reality.
"Sure, come in," said Sang Huin indifferently. He paused. "Where have you been? I didn't know what happened to you. I didn't know if you were hurt. I didn't have a telephone number to call anyone and ask about you. I didn't-" "I was busy," said Saeng Seob. Sang Huin thought about leaving this idea alone. He thought about just letting such a topic of discourse die there without comment.
But then he checked himself and halted his thoughts about dead people and dead happenings. His thoughts focused on that journalist whom he had met weeks earlier at the sports stadium. "This guy could be the perfect one and yet I have brushed him aside I don't know why." He pondered some more. "But I am involved with Saeng Seob and one doesn't just use someone until a better prospect arrives."
Then puberty came and there was an aching need for other people. The aching was incessant. "I guess you are here with friends and family. I should let you get back to them and the performance." "We're here alone," said Saeng Sob, " but I guess we should go back in before the second part begins." Sang Huin did not know if he was included in the conceptualization of "we."
In mid-afternoon they went swimming. He watched Saeng Seob's dives which were more complex and aesthetic than any he would have been able to do. They were Saeng Seob's one action of bold maneuvers that always renewed Sang Huin's interest in him for creatures of motion like himself, he knew, could only admire base kinetic movements of the outside world.
Saeng Seob and his seeing-eye dog took the 40-minute subway ride over to meet him, who would be waiting there in the terminal. Saeng Seob resented him some for quaking and thwarting the direction of his passionate river that most men felt, rode, and defined themselves from. Still, he kept the resentment mute. Being corrupted was a marginal thing when confronted daily with oceans of loneliness.
Saeng Seob had not wanted to come; and even in the hospital room he and the dog wanted to stay aloof. Despite his more gregarious tendencies and his smile so wide to compensate for the lack of expression in his sunglass-confined orbs, Seong Seob and his dog stood away from the railing of the bed.
In a flare of emotions that were sensitive but callow he wanted to "go home" -to abandon every reality that he knew here by jumping through a child's portal. He couldn't think what to say when he tried to write back to her so he went with Saeng Seob and his dog for a walk.
The wisp of air and the positioning of the tongue to begin, "So, what do you want with me" was at the roof of his mouth. "Maybe we should move in together," said Saeng Seob. "Here?" asked Sang Huin. "I don't know. Somewhere." "My job here means that I have to live here alone." "You have a college education from America. You shouldn't be wasting yourself working at a convenience store.
He thought this as Saeng Seob sat down in the living room and said, "Can you really think with that thing on?" Sang Huin knew that he couldn't at least not well but the television was their child from which conversation was begotten and extant. Without it their intimacy would have exhausted their conversation long ago. "Turn it off if you want." "It isn't bothering me. I'm used to AFKN by now."
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