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In every case the mob answered them in almost identical language: "Fair play," "Share and share alike," "Yer nyme Itler, maybe?" "Come orf it, sonny, oo er yew? Gord Orlmighty's furriner, aint E?" Having heckled the speakers, they proceeded cheerfully to clean out all stocks of available goods the refugees getting their just shares. There must be a peculiar salubrity about the English air.
"Fine lot o' gunners we got couldn't 'it a Zep 'alf a yard orf! They ain't worth the grub they get!" We returned to our marquee and sat down on our kits. My friend Private Black came in after us, smiling ruefully. I asked him what was the matter. "I was playing the piano in the Sergeants' Mess when the first one dropped. We all jumped up together and rushed out.
As they passed one of these groups they recognized and nodded to Newman and old Jack Linden, and the former left the others and came up to Crass and Slyme, who did not pause, so Newman walked along with them. 'Anything fresh in, Bob? he asked. 'No; we ain't got 'ardly anything, replied Crass. 'I reckon we shall finish up at "The Cave" next week, and then I suppose we shall all be stood orf.
What has come over you to-day?" "If he'd said a thing like that in Mare Street, Hackney, I'd have knocked his blinking 'ead orf," declared Mo Shendish. Doggie stopped and put his parcel-filled hands behind his back. "Have a try now, Mo." But Mo bade him fry his ugly face, and thus established harmony.
And that started the argument. "I reckon one man's as good as another." "I reckon a Tommy's worth a dozen Fritzes. The bleeders ought ter be wiped orf the face o' the bleed'n' earth. I see 'em do a thing or two, I tell yer me an' my mate was in the line down Plugstreet way when they crucified a Canadian. I see the tree what they did it on wi' me own eyes dirty lot o' swine!" "Bloody lies!
"That was when 'e wanted for to wash 'isself in the Fort Ditch," Ortheris explained. "Said there was too much beer in the Barrack water-butts for a God-fearing man. You was lucky in gettin' orf with wot you did, Mulvaney." "Say you so? Now I'm pershuaded I was cruel hard trated, seein' fwhat I've done for the likes av him in the days whin my eyes were wider opin than they are now.
Ginral Taylor was a standin on his hed and Wingfield Skott's koat tales ware pind over his hed and his trowsis ware kompleetly torn orf frum hisself. My wax works representin the Lord's Last Supper was likewise aboozed. Three of the Postles ware under the table and two of um had on old tarpawlin hats and raggid pee jackits and ware smokin pipes.
It's orf the likes of me that you gets your bloody livin'! I shall stop 'ere as long as I bloody well like, and if you don't like it you can go to 'ell! 'Oh! Yer will, will yer? said the Old Dear. 'We'll soon see about that. And, opening the door at the back of the bar, he roared out: 'Alf! 'Yes, sir, replied a voice, evidently from the basement. 'Just come up 'ere.
'Sorry they don't trust 'em ter us drivers, I answers. 'Don't matter worth a cent, ee says. 'I've another w'y er openin' thet strong box. Put yer 'ands be'ind yer an' turn rahnd, ee says. I done it, an' ee trusses me up like a bloomin' chicken, an' sticks my own angkincher dahn me froat. With thet ee walks along ter the door and blows the bloomin' locks orf with 'is pistol. That did it.
Fust you takes orf their gloves an' boots, then you undoes their stays an' rips open their dresses at the necks. One of you rubs their 'ands an' another their feet, an' you dabs cold water on their foreheads, an' burn brown paper under their noses. In between whiles you give 'em a drink, stiff as you can make it. It's dead easy.
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