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I was disconsolate at first and would look longingly up at the stars which were now, perhaps forever, beyond my reach. But my sons were going out there and, for some inexplicable reason, that gave me great solace. Then, too, Earth was still young and beautiful and so was Marla. I still had the full capacity to enjoy these blessings. Not for long.

On the second voyage Marla, Robert and Neil went with me. This took a little political wrangling but it was worth throwing my merit around to see them benefit from Nirvan discoveries even before the rest of humanity. Planetary Council agreed my services entitled me to this special consideration. Truly I could feel among the blessed.

Protoplastic circulatory substitutes corrected the deficiency and, just to avoid the slight possibility of further complications, the venous system was also replaced. Since the changeover there hasn't been the least trouble in that sector. By then Marla had a perfect artificial ear and both of my sons had lost their congenitally diseased livers.

I had a precocious marriage at thirty and my boys, Robert and Neil, were born within a few years after Marla and I wed. It was fortunate that I fought for government permission that early; after the accident, despite my high rating, I would have been denied the rare privilege of parenthood. That accident, the first one, took place when I was fifty.

They looked too natural for the idea to occur to people who did not know me. And Marla treated the whole thing like a big joke. "You're better than new," she used to tell me and the kids wanted to know when they could have second matter limbs of their own. Life was good to me.

"Very kind of you," I said, and walked away, determined to have no more of his lectures now or in the future. Marla wanted to know why I seemed so jumpy. "Seems is just the word," I snapped. "Never felt better in my life." "That's just what I mean," she said. "Jumpy." I let her have the last word but determined to be calmer from then on. I was.

When I came out of coma Marla was standing at my bedside, smiling down at me. "Do you feel," she stumbled, "darling, I mean, do you feel the way you did?" I was puzzled. "Sure, I'm Treb Hawley, I'm your husband, and I remember an awful fall of rocks but now I feel exactly the way I always have."

The truth could not be avoided: my mind could no longer grasp truth. I went, in grudging defeat, to Erics. "You have to win," I said and described my experiences. "Some things are inevitable," he nodded solemnly, "and some are not. This may solve all your problems." "Not all," I hoped aloud. Marla went with me to hospital. She realized the danger I was in but put the best possible face on it.