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"I fear I am reckless, Jane," I said, wistfully. "I am not brave. I am reckless, and also desparate." "You poor darling!" she said, in a broken voice. "When I think of all you are suffering, and then see your smile, my Heart aches for you." We then went in and had some ice cream soda, which I paid for, Jane having nothing but a dollar, which she needed for a manacure.
I went upstairs and manacured my nails, which usually comforts me, and put my hair up like Leila's. But nothing could calm me. I had made my own Fate, and must lie in it. And just then Hannah slipped in with a box in her hands and her eyes frightened. "Oh, Miss Barbara!" she said. "If your mother sees this!" I dropped my manacure scizzors, I was so alarmed.
I have tried to do a kind Deed today, feeling that perhaps it would soften mother's heart and she would advance my Allowence. I offered to manacure her nails for her, but she refused, saying that as Hannah had done it for many years, she guessed she could manage now. JANUARY 20TH. Today I did a desparate thing, dear Dairy. "The desparatest is the wisest course." Butler. It is Sunday.
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