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And Luman, bald-headed, too, the fiery flood descended onto him while he wuz tryin' to bear his wife, who fell into hystericks, into the settin' room, he wuz hit on top by the bilin' torrent and blistered right on his bare head as big as your hand.
And old Miss Bobbet came up that minute it wuz in the store that we were a talkin' and sez she, "It seems to me, Josiah Allen's wife, that you are too old to wear low-necked dresses and short sleeves." "And I should think you'd take cold a goin' bareheaded," sez Miss Luman Spink who wuz with her. Sez I, lookin' at 'em coldly, "Are you lunys or has softness begun on your brains?"
And if you had ten or fifteen years you could spend here you might possibly see most of the displays of your own native land and all the foreign countries. These two palaces cover twenty-eight acres, as big as Luman Gowdey's farm that he gits a good livin' on, and the hull twenty-eight acres are full of interestin' sights.
It wuz big and powerful, there hain't no doubt of that. Well, owin' to the hired girl's courage, by the time the doctor got there the tank wuz emptied, and the torrent had subsided into a drizzle. Luman Heath didn't prosecute Jabez, bein' such a good man, and how I honor him for it, how I honor him for not actin' and swearin'. The doctor may say what he wants to, he wuz noble to bear it as he did.
"But," sez she, "the New Perpetually Gushing Hot Water Tank is goin' to make us independently rich. He's takin' the plans now of Luman Heath's kitchen stove and riggin' up the machinery; Luman is to pay him lavishly, you know Luman's wife is my own cousin."
I have seen kickin' and actin' in times of trial, and how I honor a man who can refrain, and he got well as quick, I believe, as though he had acted. But as I wuz sayin' the greatest relief that come to the community from our trials wuz as follers. Take it with his doin's at our house and Luman Heath's, Jabez Wind had evidently had enough of inventions.
It seemed that Luman Heath, not havin' heard of our afflictions, had let Jabez go on with his work the very next day after he finished here. And the Perpetually Gushing Hot Water Tank wuz the death blow to Jabez Wind's inventive ambition, and alas! proved almost the death blow to Luman Heath's beloved ones, the hull family circle on 'em.
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