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My smoke had brought down a chimbly swaller, or a martin, or some such varmint, for it up and off agin' afore I could catch it, to wring its infarnal neck off, that's a fact. "Well, here was somethin' to do, and no mistake: here was to clean and groom up agin' till all was in its right shape; and a pretty job it was, I tell you.
"But they can't do it, to save their souls alive; some has it in 'em and can't get it out, physic 'em as you would, first with vanity, and then with office; others have got a way out, but have nothin' to drive thro' the gate; some is so timid, they can't go ahead; and others are in such an infarnal hurry, they spend the whole time in false starts.
So don't be so infarnal mealy-mouthed, with your mock modesty face, a turnin' up of the whites of your eyes as if you was a chokin', and savin' 'No Bun-kum, Mr. Slick. Cuss that word Bunkum! I am sorry I ever told you that are story, you will be for everlastinly a throwin' up of that are, to me now.
As he descended the short companion-ladder he turned round and observed with a comical look, "I say, Harry, I hope there ain't no stray sarpents knocking about in this here neighbourhood; 'twould be uncommon awk'ard for us to have one of they chaps waiting for us ahead and that infarnal brig still in sight astarn."
I never knowed the brute to lie in such a case; for, as he is always ramping about the woods, he's as good as a paid scout. Howsomever, the crittur did'nt speak on his own knowledge; and that infarnal Stackpole was just ripe from the North side.
"I hope I would," sez I, calmly, "upheld by Duty's apron strings." I wouldn't have it knowed in Jonesville for a dollar bill that right there in the Emperor's palace Josiah demeaned himself so, but he did say: "I don't want to hear any more about them infarnal strings." And a gorgeous official looked round at him in surprise and rebuke. Well, we didn't stay a great while after that.
"It does look kindy cruel to drag down a handsome buck and cut his glossy throat; and see a harmless fawn spout blood, and strangle and die; and I used to shut my eyes when I bit a pigeon's neck, and took little quails' heads off; but now I can do't without winkin'; and as for them infarnal bears, I'd ruther kill 'em than to eat. And you'll have to kill 'em, if you want any corn."
We'll beat the smoke arter we make the fust dip and git out of the thickest of it in the fust half of the distance, onless somethin' happens. Let her go with the current, boy, ontil yer sight comes to ye, for the current knows where it's goin', and that's more than a mortal can tell in this infarnal smoke.
I'm tired, shockin' tired, almost dead, and awful thirsty; for Heaven's sake, give me some lignum vitae, for I am so dry, I'll blow away in dust. "This is a Swoi-ree, Squire, this is London society; this is rational enjoyment, this is a meeting of friends, who are so infarnal friendly they are jammed together so they can't leave each other.
After she had had one of her lessons one evening she said to me, "I wish I wa'n't so darned infarnal ignorant. I wish I could learn enough to teach school!" "We're all ignorant here," I said. "Magnus ain't," said she. "He went to a big school in the old country. He showed me the picture of it, and of his father's house. It's got four stone chimneys."
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