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And there wuz all the methods of irrigation, draining, engines, wind-mills, pumps, farm wagons, all kinds of fruit, sugar canes, vegetable sugar, candy stores, confectionery displays, vegetables of all kinds that wuz ever hearn on, some on 'em of such monster size that you never dremp on 'em, unless it wuz in a night-mair.
In a moment of imbecility I mentioned what I had seen from the shop-window at Eastwich, and, though they passed the matter off with a joke, I could see that they were mightily disturbed by it. Their efforts to induce me to join them were redoubled, and Hearn took to calling almost daily at my house usually with documents and signatures which he tried to persuade me to copy.
"Well, I lay out to see to it myself, and if they ever charge me for 'ratage' and 'satage' I'm goin' to see what they are, and how they look." "Well," sez I, "if you're bound to go, I'll get up and get a good breakfast and go with you." It was the day of the Woman's Suffrage Parade and I wanted to see it. I wanted to like a dog, and had ever since I hearn of it.
"A nice one to watch beavers, you are!" cried the Boy, angry and disappointed. "Why where've they all gone to?" demanded Jabe, rubbing his eyes. "They're the most interestin' critters I ever hearn tell of!" "Interesting!" retorted the Boy, scornfully. "So interesting you went to sleep! And you snored so they thought it was an earthquake. Not another beaver'll show a hair round here to-night.
Margaret came out of the house. "Howdy, Laz." "Ain't runnin' no foot races, but so as to be about." "Folks all as well as usual?" "Ain't hearn no loud complaint." "Miz Mayfield," said Margaret, "Kintchin fotch me a letter from the post-office this mornin' an' as my eyes ain't right good to-day, I wish you'd come in an' read it to me." "Yes, gladly."
Lots on 'em talkin' language I never hearn before, but I thought, poor things, you never had the advantage of livin' in Jonesville, so I overlooked it in 'em.
"What did you see, Mose, and how did you see it?" asked the preacher. "Ah war a-hidin' behin' de upper big post of de barn gate, an' ah hearn hosses' hoofs beatin' up de road, an' soon de constables cum along wid de prisoners. Wa'n't dem moonshiners mad, do? Jes' as dey war 'proaching de gate Sam Wiles said: 'Dat cantin' preacher has got me 'rested twice now, but he won't do it ag'in.
And then I hearn a sharp raspin' voice clost to me sayin': "Sir, I will thank you to onhand my wife!" I wouldn't hardly have knowed my pardner's voice, such burnin' anger showed in it and wuz depictered on his liniment as I turned round and faced him. And he went on: "Samantha, have I lived with you most a century to be deceived in you now?"
Then he went into pork and first we knew Sam wuz a very rich man, lived in great style, kep' his carriage, but wuz awful mean, so we heard, hadn't no morals at all to speak on so fur as wimmen wuz concerned, and we had hearn that Jane Olive not bein' over and above happy in marriage, and forgittin' to all appearance she had ever dickered with mistress and maid, wuz tryin' her best to work her way in among the aristockracy, she wuz dretful ambitious and so wuz Sam, they wanted to go with the first.
She will be the millionaire's wife, and I'll go back to my dingy little office and write paragraphs heavy enough to sink a cork ship. Thus will end my June idyll; but should I live a century I will always feel that Gilbert Hearn married my wife." For nearly an hour I sat listlessly in my chair and watched the shadows lengthen across the valley.
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