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"And yet, if your Majesty will permit me to say so," Quijada replied with a low bow, "he may be in a very different condition to-morrow. I heard Dr. Mathys himself remark that the life of a gouty patient was like a showery day in July gloomy enough while the thunder-storm was raging, but radiant before and afterward until the clouds rose again.
He have the gout so bad! and just as I come within a couple o' inches o' the right depth, out come the edge of a great stone in the near corner at the foot of the bed. Thinks I, he'll never lie comfortable with that same under his gouty toe. But the trouble I had to get out that stone! I du assure you, sir, it took me nigh half the day.
Oh, my dear, she may deck herself with diamonds, as they say she does, and call herself happy, which she is not, with a gouty, ill-tempered old husband who is jealous of her, but I'll be bound she thinks of Giles sometimes with regret, and scorns herself for her folly. Poor Mr. Hamilton! And this had all happened about six or seven years ago. No wonder he looked stern and said bitter things.
This success emboldened them, and, resuming with self-confidence, the practice of medicine, they nursed Chamberlan, the beadle, for pains in his ribs; Migraine the mason, who had a nervous affection of the stomach; Mère Varin, whose encephaloid under the collar-bone required, in order to nourish her, plasters of meat; a gouty patient, Père Lemoine, who used to crawl by the side of taverns; a consumptive; a person afflicted with hemiplegia, and many others.
Three captains and a squire, to say nothing of a gouty colonel, had already fallen victims, and had heard their fate in her low, soft tones, which could whisper a fashionable oath in the accent of a hymn, and say "no" so sweetly that one could only beg to hear the word again.
That was very right. I'm so glad of that. But who would doubt that you would show a proper spirit? And what did he say? 'Not much, indeed. 'I won't trouble you about him. I don't in the least doubt but all that will come right. And what sort of man is Sir Anthony? 'A common-place sort of a man; very gouty, and with none of his wife's strength. I liked him the best of them all.
"At least," I muttered to myself, "it will bring these damning doubts to a final trial. If they have been fools heretofore, opportunity will serve to madden them. We shall see we shall know all very soon; and then! Ay, then! Mrs Porterfield, good old lady, half blind, half deaf, infirm and gouty, but very good natured, easily complied with my request to accommodate my friend. My friend!
Half a score of ambitious politicians, gouty old financiers, bald-headed old toffs, with their waxed moustaches and false teeth. That's what we mean when we talk about 'My Country': a pack of selfish, soulless, muddle- headed old men.
Bevies of flashing-eyed American girls "took him in" with parthian glances, and even a widowed Russian princess, hobbling by, easing her gouty steps with a jeweled cane, gazed back upon the moody Adonis and sighed for the vanished days, when she possessed both the physical and mental capacity to wander from the beaten paths of the proprieties.
He consented; and during the next fortnight I did little else than give him lessons in elocution, following to a tittle the method of the great professor, which I had picked up, listening behind the door. At the end of that period we paid a visit to his relation, an old gouty Tory, who at first received us very coolly.
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