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"Now, I don't claim no second sight in the matter of female features: I ain't had no coachin'; not even as much as the ordinary, being raised on a bottle, but I've studied the ornery imprints of men's thoughts, over green tables and gun bar'ls, till I can about guess whether they've drawed four aces or an invite to a funeral.
"I'm sorry, but this is April 1st, and I'll wait no longer. I'm ready to send some of my boys up for early exams, and I want to know where I stand." "Arthurs, what is it exactly that you want? Things have been in an awful mess, we know. State your case and we'll try to give you a definite answer." "I want full charge of the coachin' the handlin' of the team, as I always had before.
"I'll make a star of a youngster like you, if you'll take coachin'. Why not?" "Oh, you don't know," returned Ken, with a long face. "Say, you haven't struck me as a kid with no nerve. What's wrong with you?" "It was I who slugged Captain Dale and caused that big rush between the freshmen and sophomores. I've lived like a hermit ever since." "So it was you who hit Dale.
He shows up on the coachin' parties, and he's got himself a reg'lar English coachman's rig, with boots outside his trouse's, and a long coat and a fuzzy plug-hat: I tell you, he looks gay! He don't spend his winters at Lion's Head: he is off to Europe about as soon as the house closes in the fall, and he keeps bringin' home new dodges.
It's coachin', ridin', and golf and auto-racin' and polo and squash; really the young folks don't go in at all except to dance and eat; and it's quite right, you know. It's quite decently English, now. Why, at Morris Park the other day, the crowd on the lawn looked quite like Ascot, actually."
The doing of kind and generous acts for utter strangers has not been a ruling passion with me. But so far I have handled several assignments in which have I failed?" "Look who's been coachin' you, though!" says I. J. Bayard bows and waves a manicured hand graceful.
"Ye could do it fine, I think," he said thoughtfully, "wi' the use of yer head an' the bit coachin' and help I'd provide. It's like this. Pachugan's no so good a deestrict as it used tae be. The fur trade's slowin' down, an' the Company's no so keen as it was in the old days when it was lord o' the North. I mind when a factor was a power but that time's past. The Company's got ither fish tae fry.
"Like a'nuff I hab," said the vender warily. "De pint am, howsumeber, isn't de cakes good?" "Yes, they seem better every day, but they are not the same every day. I reckon some one's coaching you." "Law sakes, Massa, wo't you mean by coachin' me?" "Do you make the cakes?" was asked pointblank. "Now, Massa, you's gittin' too cur'us. Wot de Scripter say? Ask no questions fer conscience' sake."
Meanwhile Whitey has posted his camera men in the shrubbery, where they can get the focus without bein' seen, and has rounded us up for a little preliminary coachin'. "Remember," says he, "what we're supposed to be doing is a wedding, back in the days of Robin Hood, with all the merry villagers given a day off. So make it snappy. We want action, lots of it. Let yourselves go.
Denver's playin' at a fast clip." "I'm coming out today," replied Miss Ellston, thoughtfully. "Pat, what's a knocker?" "Now, Miss Madge, are you askin' me that after I've been coachin' you in baseball for years?" questioned Pat, in distress. "I know what a knocker is, as everybody else does. But I want to know the real meaning, the inside-ball of it, to use your favorite saying."
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